Ammo and Enchiladas Read online

  “Not today. When will you leave, do you know?” Was that needy?

  “I don’t. I need to call in before Monday, see if I still have a job.” Lex winked.

  “Ah. Well, you’re welcome to hang out with me, you know….” That was totally needy. “And I’m sure with Travis too.”

  “He seemed better yesterday, but I’m loving being with you. And I feel so bad for him and want to help.”

  “I don’t know how else to help. Honest.” He stroked Peaches’s long, soft fur. “But whatever I can do.”

  “I know you will. What he’ll need from here is to be remembered on holidays and such, and to have someone to remember Matt with.”

  “Yeah. One day maybe he’ll forgive me for living. That’ll take a while.”

  “I think it will, yeah. He’s a butthead.” Lex said it without malice.

  “He’s a queen. I love him a lot. Matty adored him.” And that had been enough for him.

  “Yeah. He’ll be better about it now, I think, but people react to grief differently.”

  “Sure they do. I’m not mad.” Much.

  “Uh-huh.” Lex chuckled but shrugged. “I would be, because Trav can say the most hurtful things.”

  “Yeah. Yeah, he can. I tried, you know?”

  “I know.” Lex reached over to grab his hand, then squeezed. Peaches leaned in and bit Lex’s thumb. “Ow!” Lex blinked at the cat. “So much for friends.”

  “I don’t think she’s made her mind up yet. Cream, though, she’s got you.”

  “Yeah.” Lex shook his head. “Breakfast?”

  “Weck’s?”

  “Hell, yeah.” Lex eased up off the floor, grinning wide.

  “Rock on.” He let Lex help him up.

  “What’s your favorite?” Lex asked. “I like the ultimate papas.”

  “Uhn. I like the veggie papas with extra veg. Oh my God.”

  “Yum. We’ll have to split a cinnamon roll at some point too.” Lex rubbed his belly, looking pretty lascivious.

  “Oh. Oh, a man after my own heart.” He was all over a grilled roll.

  “Good deal. What do we need to do before we go?” Lex was surprisingly domestic.

  “Not a thing. I’ll just close up after we’re ready to go.”

  “Cool.” Lex bounced a little, kind of like a boxer, from foot to foot. God, that was cute.

  He reached out, cupped one buttcheek. “Come on, honey. Let me feed you.”

  “Yes, please.” They headed back to dress, moving around like two people far more used to each other than they ought to be.

  “You want to hit the Fruit Basket and grab stuff for supper on our way home?”

  “I do. We’ll make some kind of pasta, huh?” Lex bumped hips with him on his good side.

  “Oh, hell yeah. With garlic bread, hmm?” He was all in.

  “Yep. I love me some garlic bread.” They both found clothes, tugging them on and going through the teeth-brushing, hair-combing thing. The best part was the random touching, the kisses.

  He could get so used to this very fast.

  Lord, he was in so much trouble.

  Chapter Eleven

  “HEY, BOSS.” Lex kinda held his breath, knowing he was probably about to get a tongue-lashing.

  “Do I know you?”

  “Ha. Yeah, I’ve been evaluating my life choices.”

  “What the hell does that mean? Are you going to become a belly dancer?”

  “No. It just means I might be asking for a leave of absence. I’m looking into moving back up here.” He believed in being honest. He needed to see his folks, needed to find out what was going on with him and Brant….

  “No shit? You know that force is having… issues.” Issues. That was like calling World War II a skirmish.

  “I do. And I love you guys. You know that.” He did. The men and women he worked with were amazing.

  “So? What’s up, Espana? Seriously.”

  “I met someone.” Hell, he told this guy everything. “I don’t want to rush things, but I want to leave my options open.”

  A short, sharp bark sounded. “At a funeral? That’s damn impressive, Espana. Damn impressive.”

  “I know, right? What’s even weirder is I met him at the wedding and didn’t even remember.”

  “You’re not serious.”

  “He was the other best man.”

  “Wow.” Gutierrez paused. “Okay, I can probably swing it, but I need you to come work a few days of shifts so I can move things around.”

  “Sure. Of course. I won’t leave you hanging.” He needed the recommendation. Hell, he needed the friends.

  “Cool. I can live with that. I need you by Wednesday.”

  Well, that was better than Monday.

  “I’ll be there. I just….”

  “Don’t waffle, man.” God, he respected the fuck out of the son of a bitch.

  “Okay. I’ll be in Wednesday. What shift?” Right, no waffling.

  “Be in at seven. We’ll talk.”

  “Got it.” He couldn’t believe he did that. He’d just told his boss he was going to…. To what? What the actual fuck?

  He shook his head. Christ. Now he needed to call the guys up here and see if they were even interested in him transferring. And then there was Brant. What if this was a fling?

  He had no idea. Maybe it was Matt dying. He’d not known the man well, but… well, after the bombing, he didn’t need a huge reminder that life was short. He wanted to try. He wanted to cook with Brant, laugh, play checkers, and watch stupid movies. He’d never once wanted to go on more than just a few dates. Now he wanted to… see what happened.

  “You okay, honey? Everything all right?” Travis popped his head in. “I was going to make popcorn.”

  “I would love some.” He smiled at Travis. “I just asked for a leave of absence.”

  “At your job? For me?”

  “Yeah.” He pushed back guilt. It was partly for Travis, to reconnect with his old friend, with his family.

  “Honey, are you sure? I mean, you know you’re welcome here, for as long as you want, but….”

  “Oh, hon, if you don’t want me here, I get it, but I’m thinking it might be time for a change.”

  “Really? It might be nice to have a roommate.”

  Yeah, and it would be nicer to be Brant’s. Lex just made a noncommittal noise. He would start at Trav’s and work his way over, come to that.

  “I’m going to have to head back for a few weeks. You know, this is going to take time. It’s a process.”

  “Sure. Of course.” Travis watched him carefully. “What does Brant think?”

  “I have no idea.” None. Well, that wasn’t true. Brant seemed to like him in that big bed just fine. But did Brant have an opinion on him moving up? Lex hadn’t been brave enough to ask.

  “Maybe you… I mean, you’ve spent the night there….”

  “I’m not sure, Trav, not of anything.” Lex spread his hands, not wanting to lie, but not wanting to make himself promises.

  “No. None of us are, right?” Travis came to him and held him. Tight. Lex held on in return, knowing Travis had to be freaking out over everything. Every single thing. Lex couldn’t even begin to comprehend all this, and Matt hadn’t been his husband.

  “We’ll be okay, buddy.” He kissed Travis on the cheek. “Want to go to lunch? I’ll take you.”

  “I—sure. Where?”

  “You pick, honey. You want the Flying Star?”

  “Oh, fancy! I’d love that.”

  “Well, get dressed.” Lex felt like he was neglecting Travis a little.

  “Yeah, yeah. I’m not naked.”

  “You stink,” he teased.

  “Oh ho! Asshole. At least I brushed my teeth.”

  “Thank God for that. Dragon man.” Lex loved the hint of the former Travis.

  “I’ll be right back.” Travis looked him over. “You could comb your hair.” Trav grabbed his hair, tugging. “You need to do your roots.”


  “Do I?” He hadn’t even looked. “I’m all gray.”

  “Silver, but yeah. Old fucker.”

  “Am not!” Just early to gray. Lex pinched Trav’s ass. “Go on. We’ll have an outing.”

  “An outing. Christ.” Trav grabbed him again. “Thanks, honey. Seriously.”

  “You’re welcome. You know I love you more than my luggage.”

  “I know. I know. Penal queen.”

  “Go.” He pushed gently, then flapped his hands. It was weird, and it was going to be hard, but Lex thought Trav was going to be all right. He would help any way he could too. He texted Brant, just to let him know what was up, then wondered if that was oversharing.

  Cool. Coming for supper tonite?

  Totes. What do I bring?

  Thinking steaks and potatoes?

  Sounds good. Send me a list and I can stop on the way.

  K. Looking forward to it.

  Me too.

  He sent a smiley with a heart and got a picture of Mouse sitting on the vacuum for his trouble.

  He headed upstairs to make sure his hair was okay and that he’d brushed his teeth. Maybe he did need to do his roots. Yikes. What was that stuff? Brylcreem or something?

  Travis would know. He probably had, like, a guy. A stylist. Lex had a barber who did fades and mohawks. Brant had… Supercuts. He knew it. Supercuts on his lunch hour. He chuckled. That was so practical. Like all medical folks he knew, except the ones who had wild colors in their hair. He could see Brant doing that for Halloween. Maybe… maybe he’d be able to see Brant’s costume this year. Oh….

  He liked that idea a lot. A hell of a lot. Grinning, he trotted down the stairs to meet Travis.

  “You driving or am I?” Travis asked.

  “I can, no problem.” He’d just gotten gas, and Travis hadn’t been out in days.

  “Thanks. I…. It doesn’t seem like it should be the same place, you know? Like it’s disrespectful for life to go on.”

  “I know, honey. I swear, you’ll figure it out.”

  “Maybe. I don’t know yet. Right now, I’m going to have lunch.”

  “Yep.” He took Travis’s hand. “I might have a burger.”

  “Yeah? I’m going for the quinoa salad.”

  “Skinny minny,” he teased, leading Trav out before he changed his mind.

  “Only because I want dessert.”

  “Ah, now we see. Good choice.” Flying Star was known for its baked goods. “Chocolate?”

  “God yes. Something that’s ten thousand calories with ice cream.”

  “I’m with you, man.” He so was. With two forks. “You want to go to that one on Rio Grande?”

  “I do. That’s better than Corrales.”

  “Cool.” If they could find a parking space, they’d be golden. He knew there was parking out back, which a lot of folks forgot.

  “Hey, Lex.” Travis reached over, patted his leg. “I love you, huh?”

  “I love you too, hon. I really do.” They were going to make a good day out of it.

  Then he was going home to Brant.

  Chapter Twelve

  SORRY, MAN. Not feeling great. Breakfast instead?

  Brant had taken a tumble in the driveway moving out the trash cans, and more than his pride was hurt. He wasn’t even sure he was going to be able to get off the couch.

  Ever.

  What happened? Lex’s text was gratifyingly fast.

  Fell sorry huh

  I’ll be over in a few

  He didn’t know what to say. No, don’t? He wanted Lex there. He didn’t want to look like a wuss. And he couldn’t cook. No way.

  See you soon.

  He sighed, putting his head back on the couch. Maybe a tiny nap. Lex had a key, and Brant had muscle relaxants. Both important things.

  He dozed, or at least he thought he must have, because he woke up to the amazing smell of baking bread.

  “Lex?” Come on. Come on, sit up.

  “Yep. Don’t move, baby. It’s okay. Do you need anything right now?” Lex came out of the kitchen to peck a kiss on his lips.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

  “Right, because I would think that.” Lex stroked his cheek. “What happened?”

  “I went ass over teakettle, moving the trash cans.” He wasn’t sure what he’d slipped on, to be honest.

  “Do I need to go look, make sure there’s nothing to trip over? I put rolls in the oven but haven’t started steaks. I wanted to make sure you hadn’t hurt your face.”

  His knees, his hands, his hip—yeah. Face? No.

  “So, I have the stuff for soup or steak and potatoes.”

  “Sounds great. I’ll come help.” If he could stand. Come on. Come on, up.

  “No. You sit. Seriously. Do you need Tylenol or something? Did you clean up any scrapes?”

  “I took a muscle relaxant.” Brant’s cheeks were burning. He hadn’t tripped like that in a while.

  “Okay. I’ll have a thorough inspection later.” Lex gave him a cheeky wink.

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” He levered himself up on his butt. “Did you have a decent day?”

  “I did. Travis was in a good mood.”

  “Good. Is he ready to get back to school?” He was going back Monday—at least assuming he could walk.

  “I think so, yeah. He talked to the admin folks, and they’re giving him a classroom assistant for a few weeks, just to see how he does.”

  “He’ll be fine. He’s a great teacher.” Okay. Up to help in the kitchen.

  “Hey. Sit. I got this. I’ll holler if I need you.” Lex came back over to ease him down on the couch again. “Seriously.”

  “I feel like an idiot.”

  “Trust me, we all do when we go down. Happens, though.” Lex flapped a hand. “Be right back. I’ll just put the potatoes in.”

  “Yeah. We all have our moments, I guess.” Some more than others.

  “We do.” Lex laughed. “You should have seen me last year. I was pursuing a suspect on foot during monsoon season. I busted my ass in the middle of West Picacho, just slid like a runner going into third, legs up and spread.”

  “Oh man. Did you get road rash on your jewels?”

  “I got it on the jewels, on my ass, on my thighs. I looked like a motorcycle cop.”

  “Mmm….” Lex would look hot on a motorcycle. “Do you ride?”

  “I know how.” Lex’s voice floated from the kitchen. “I’m not good at it. Lack of practice.”

  “I do too. I mean, I did when I was a kid. I thought I was a stud.”

  “You were. You still are.” Lex sounded very sure.

  He laughed, but he appreciated it. “You know, I do pretty good for a guy who was told he’d never walk again.”

  “See?” Lex wandered back into the front room. “Will it hurt if I sit?”

  “Not a bit.” He slid his legs around. “Come sit with me.”

  “Cool. No sense starting the steaks until the rolls and spuds are done.” Lex moved in beside him, but let him decide how close. Fuck that shit, he wanted access. Lex was here; he was taking advantage.

  “Hey, you.” He took a gentle kiss.

  “Hey. I’m sorry you’re feeling bad, baby. That sucks.”

  “I’m sorry to have almost wasted part of our time together. I’m guarding it.”

  “So am I.” Lex chuckled, then leaned to kiss him again. “But I’m stubborn.”

  “You? No.” He let himself press in, hard. “Never say so.”

  He felt like a flirt, like he was trying to lure Lex in, which was weird.

  “Mm-hmm. I really am. I want to be in homicide sometime soon. They say those are the most stubborn cops.”

  “Yeah? Detective Espana, huh? Nice ring.” It was a little scary, thinking about that, about Lex hunting murderers.

  “You know it. I would love a desk more than a car.”

  “Yeah? How does it work? I mean, I don’t know anything about it.” He held Lex’s hand, t
racing the strong fingers.

  “Well, we’re all overworked, but I would be on a better shift, a better team. Less face time with the street.”

  “Do you like it? Being an officer?”

  “I do. I mean, I thought about becoming an EMT, but that’s way more bodily fluid.”

  Brant began to laugh, because his life was all bodily fluids, all the time. Babies didn’t care.

  “I know, right? My doctor friend, Dusty, laughs at me. So does his partner, Nate.”

  “Yeah. They’re watching your house?” He needed to remember that he had a life here too, one that wasn’t lonely. He had a support group outside of Lex.

  “My plant. That’s really all I worry about.”

  That was sort of sad. “I bet Mouse would find you a friend.”

  “I bet he would. I can always come see Mouse. Right?” Lex looked right into his eyes.

  “Always. Mouse and the girls adore you. They’re going to miss you when you go home.”

  “I know. Me too.” Lex cleared his throat, and then the strangest look crossed the man’s face. “I asked for a leave of absence. I have to go back Wednesday so shifts can be rearranged.”

  “A…. You’re going to come up here?” Seriously? A thousand questions crossed his mind, but behind that was a quiet, hysterical little voice cheering.

  “I want to look into it, yeah. I think I could have a job, no problem. I need to see my folks, maybe.” Lex grinned a little sheepishly. “Warn them.”

  “Are they local?” Are you staying with them?

  “Uh, mostly. Placitas now. Not too far.”

  “Oh, that’s nice. Neat art.”

  “Yeah. Mom’s people had some land out there. They used to be down off Menaul.”

  “Oh yeah? There are some nice houses out there.” Brantley didn’t know what to say, dammit. He had ten thousand questions. Ten thousand and one. The big one was, does this have anything to do with me?

  “Is this okay? I mean, I told Trav it was partly for him, but I want—” Lex took a deep breath. “I think we need to see where this is going?”

  “Oh.” He felt like all the air went out of the room. “I was too much of a coward to ask. I should have.”

  “You should.” Lex grabbed his hand. “I feel like this is different.”